Cold and Flu Season

8 Oct

flu season

Ever since becoming a parent, Mommy has developed an extreme case of cold and flu season paranoia. The common cold might as well be the Ebola virus for the precautions Mommy is taking to avoid it.  But despite dousing herself in Purell, overdosing on wheat grass and oregano oil, and resorting to socially-alienating elbow maneuvers to open doors, Mommy knows it’s all in vain because your daycare is also known as the Centre for Infectious Diseases. It took less than two post-enrollment days for you to contract your first cold and a year later Mommy is still dreaming of the day she can get a snot-free family photo.  Thankfully, you have thus far miraculously managed to avoid the flu. No thanks to the flu shot you didn’t get. Which, after five hours of migraine-inducing internet research, Mommy concluded was the most responsible, atrocious, intelligent, ignorant decision she’s ever made as a parent. But should the family go rogue again this year? When you’re trying to climb the corporate ladder, there’s nothing more career-limiting than missing the most important week of the fiscal year because you’re in bed with the flu. Except being the martyr who shows up anyway and contaminates the entire office with Influenza A. (Note – Mommy is obviously referring to a “friend” who did this, not herself.)

DRINK: The Flu-lixer. Boil water and add fresh grated ginger root, fresh lemon juice, a dash of cayenne pepper, and honey to taste. Make as much as required to wash down the Vitamin C and Cold FX pills you’ll be popping like Tic Tacs until March.

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8 Responses to “Cold and Flu Season”

  1. Jordana (@MamaKujo) October 8, 2013 at 9:10 am #

    Add some whiskey and make it a Hot Toddy! 😉

  2. Sandy N October 8, 2013 at 11:05 am #

    This is why I stopped (for a now) trying to climb up the corporate ladder, my very responsible, atrocious, intelligent and ignorant decision and… very career limiting 😛

  3. LadyBird Magpie of Parkdale October 8, 2013 at 12:17 pm #

    Oh yeah, I’m rocking the office contaminator right now, and peeing just a little every time I cough. I’m also pregnant, so it really is unavoidable, and also the worst, because I can’t drink to forget.

    • Reasons Mommy Drinks October 8, 2013 at 9:09 pm #

      Hahaha. Being pregnant and sick is The Worst. Everything is off limits. Oh how I longed for Neocitran. Honey, lemon and hot water just wasn’t cutting it.

  4. CoughSpot October 9, 2013 at 7:33 am #

    You crack me up. Just wanted to say that vaccine or no vaccine, teaching our kids proper coughing etiquette has reduced a lot of my stress. But I do love a nice Hot Toddy…

    • Reasons Mommy Drinks October 9, 2013 at 9:25 am #

      Apparently coughing etiquette is now taught at daycare! Seeing my toddler cough into their sleeve (or vampire elbow as they call it) for the first time was the cutest!

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