Dora The Explorer: Live

3 Dec

Dora, Beer Me.

Three weeks ago:

DADDY: I got us “Dora the Explorer: Live” tickets.

MOMMY: Cute! Memories for a lifetime!

DADDY: With the upgraded “meet Dora backstage” passes!

MOMMY: This will be so fun!

During the concert:

DADDY: Good thing we paid extra for backstage passes. So many lines! And screaming! And airborne illnesses! Yay!

MOMMY: Our child knows all the words to these songs. He watches too much TV. We are terrible parents.

DADDY: The venue parking alone cost more than we put in his RESP this month.

MOMMY: Is apple juice and half a churro a balanced dinner…?


MOMMY: I’m so tired. I might die of tired. Please play an acoustic version of “I’m the map” at my funeral. What time is it? Like 4am?

DADDY: It’s 6:45pm.

MOMMY: Let’s never do this again.

The next day:

DADDY: Sesame Street Live is coming next month.

MOMMY: Cute! Let’s do it.

DRINK:   The School of Rock. Remember your pre-kid concert days and pour a warm domestic beer into a red Solo cup. Turn up the Weezer and sing along with these parental advisory lyrics: “If you want to destroy my sweater / draw on it with permanent marker / puke organic cranberry juice on it / leave your crayons in the dryer / pull this thread and just walk away…”


5 Responses to “Dora The Explorer: Live”

  1. Shannon December 3, 2013 at 7:43 am #

    That’s funny. I have been wanting to take my kids to a live show, I really like the Imagination Movers. Not sure I could handle Dora myself either! Still thinking about it.

    • Reasons Mommy Drinks December 3, 2013 at 7:44 am #

      Going to a Live Children’s Show is like labour. During it you’re like “never again!!!!” but then a few weeks go by and you get Mommy Brain which washes away the bad bits and suddenly you’re all “I will totally do this again!” and next thing you know, you’ve booked tickets to Sesame Street Live.

      • Shannon December 3, 2013 at 8:19 am #

        Lol I can see that.

  2. Christina December 3, 2013 at 8:40 am #

    Disney on Ice was like torture on ice. I thought I would kill myself. We’re totally doing it again in the spring!

    • Reasons Mommy Drinks December 3, 2013 at 9:06 am #

      Ha ha ha!! Right??! Parents: Suckers for punishment in the name of building childhood memories they may foggily remember. Maybe.

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